Praying in Home Groups

Each of us believes prayer matters; we recognize that we need to pray more, but struggle to make it a priority. We are good at finding excuses as to why we can’t – work, children, busy-ness... but they are just that: excuses. This article aims to help us examine our praying together. Let’s begin by looking at some problems with prayer.

Problems with Prayer: Prayer ruts
Most Christian groups pray and often drift into prayer ruts. We are prone to this with anything that we do regularly, it just becomes a formality, something we do almost without thinking. The danger is that our prayer times become rushed intercessions, a quick nod of thanks to God at the Bible studies’ end, a shopping list of prayers for the sick or ‘those who aren't with us’, or general prayers for general things. There is nothing wrong with those prayer but they are what I call default prayers. They are the result of a lazy or unthinking prayer life

Most Home Groups find it easier to do Bible study, or almost anything other than praying together. Just think about your group; how long do you spend studying the Bible or having coffee, or chatting about your week, and how long do you spend praying? Prayer often gets squeezed into five minutes at the end or beginning, lacks passion and is often punctuated with long silences.

The Bible’s challenge
Is that right? Should that be the norm? Or are we missing something? Paul in Colossians 4v2 writes these word; “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.”
Home Groups are an opportunity to be devoted to prayer, they provide an opportunity for us to learn to pray together, but how? Here are some thoughts:

• A Group rarely goes beyond its leader. This isn’t about public prayer but private prayer. People can spot whether we know God intimately, whether our prayers when together flow from a close personal relationship with God. Leaders set the tone! What tone am I setting as a leader?
• Prioritise Prayer. Personally and when meeting together we need to do this. Do you pray in your group at the start as people arrive or at the end when people are tired? When would be the best time to pray to show its importance? How do you structure your prayer times? How do you share encouragements and prayer points? How do we ensure the group continues praying for each other after the meeting has ended? How can we do this better?
• A Prayer Diary. Some of us will use these personally they enable us to look back and see what we have prayed for and encourage us to thank God for answered prayer. They also help us see what we are praying for? How could this be done for your home group?
• Know how and why you pray. Hopefully the preceding studies will have helped us understand how and why we pray. We pray because God has set his love on us, called us, justified us and has given us a glorious future to look forward to through his Son. We pray because God is our Father, we are his adopted children and it is a natural thing to do. Romans 8:32 reminds us that “He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things”.

Time Out
Take some time out to think about the questions raised in this section. How would you put them into practical personally and in your group?

Understanding Prayer
Our prayers are rooted not in tradition, the latest thought or ‘how to’ manual but they are the result of the gospel where we are taught how to pray. We pray:
· to God our Father
· through the Son (on the basis of his death and resurrection)
· in and by the Spirit
· using everyday language.
The source of our prayers is the sovereign will of God revealed in his word, the motive for prayer is God acting, and the enabler of prayer is the Holy Spirit. We learn to pray as we read God's word and discern his will. Prayer does not have a special language, or require long periods of waiting for God to answer us as he speaks to us through his word. Instead we pray as children who want to speak to their loving Father. That is the basis of our prayers as individuals and when we gather together.

Unshackling our prayers
Prayers in the Bible often have a far grander scope that our prayers do. They are concerned with the sovereign purposes of God (Psalm 2); the salvation of God’s people (2 Kings 19:14-19); the growth of the gospel (Acts 4:24-30); the coming of the Kingdom of God (Matthew 6:9-13); and the reputation and glory of God (Psalm 148, 150).

Time Out
In 1 Timothy 2:1-7 Paul gives (he urges) Timothy a list of things which they should pray for. Read it. What are we to pray for? What is the focus of this prayer?

Just as God is the hero in the Bible so the Bible’s prayers are God centred. We learn what to pray for as we read the prayers God has recorded for us in the Bible and think God’s thoughts after him.

It isn’t an exhaustive list we can also bring personal needs to God in prayer (1 Pet 5:7; Matt 6:25-34, Phil 4:6). In fact we are exhorted to bring even the smallest thing to God who is our Father and who cares for us.

Thinking through what we pray For when together
Often in home groups and at other times when Christians pray together we begin by collecting prayer points. It is a good way to show our concern and love for one another, but it can be very time consuming – how often do we spend longer collecting prayer points than praying for them? It can also be hard to share some things openly and honestly with a big group, and along with that we are often sharing our needs and concerns – it can be a very self centred way of praying. The group prays for what I perceive I need. Is there a better way of doing this? How should what we have studied influence what we pray about?

I take it as read that we all agree that our prayers should be about more than just our concerns and situations so, what else should we pray for?

The Gospel. Could you adopt a missionary to pray for? It doesn’t have to be one overseas – it could be the pastor of another local or national church, a Schools’ Worker or someone else who you will write to as a group and get prayer requests from.

Unbelievers. Pray for friends and family, a great prayer to pray for them and yourselves is Colossians 4:2-6.

Your witness. We all struggle with evangelism - keeping this on the agenda in prayer will help, again Acts 4 is a great prayer to pray for one another.

Your Church. One danger is that we get caught up in praying for programmes or numbers. Instead we should be praying for increasing maturity and continuing growth in the gospel. Again the Bible provides a great model for us in Ephesians 3:13-21. What does this prayer of Paul’s teach you to pray for one another? We have a church prayer diary could you as a group pray through this?

God’s concerns. Keep your Bible open when you pray. Why not pray through the passage you have just studied or pray for those things we see modelled (Appendix A gives some passages where you can find prayers to pray from the Bible).


Time Out
Take some time out to think about the questions raised in this section. How would you put them into practice personally and in your group?

How to pray together
Groups are funny things, some groups gel together instantly, others are slow growers, in some we are instantly at home whilst in others it takes time and effort. Some people find it easy to pray whilst others find it hard to pray out loud, so how do we help our group be a place of prayer where everyone is encouraged to pray?

When we pray with others we are not praying in private, therefore our prayers should be different. This applies wherever and whenever we pray with others. Here are some practical helps on serving others in prayer:

• We are leading others in prayer so use ‘we’ and ‘our’ not ‘I’ and ‘my’.
• Pray short prayers – it encourages others to pray, helps people concentrate, and avoids repetition.
• Keep prayers simple so everyone can understand.
• Don’t use a prayer voice.
• Pray so people can hear.
• Why not encourage those praying by joining with them in an ‘Amen’.
• If you found someone’s prayer a real encouragement why not say so to them afterwards.

Sometimes prayer in small groups can become deadened by routine, so why not mix up how you pray, why not try:
Breaking into smaller groups. Many people find it easier to pray in a two or three rather than a larger group.
Writing down what you pray for. Why not try a prayer wall, or use post its (large ones) then people can look up and see what the things are you are praying for.
All at the same time. This works particularly well with young people, but why not be brave and give it a go. Everyone prays at the same time (usually a count in helps), it can remove embarrassment for those who find praying with others listening hard.
Partnerships. Could you have twos or threes who regularly pray together as part of your group time. They could then be encouraged to meet outside of Home Group to pray too. The advantages are that this builds trust and good gospel relationships of accountability. The difficulties are that they take time to build and can become exclusive.

Time Out
Take some time out to think about the questions raised in this section. How would you put them into practice personally and in your group? What other creative ways of praying can you come up with?